I literally had no idea what type of seminar or situation I was walking into today when I showed up for Paideia in the Ballrooms but I can safely say that I was excited the moment I found out :] My first seminar (as I believe was for most everyone in our group) was the Gender Identity Seminar, dealing with the definitions and cultural occurrences of homophobia, heternormativism, and heterosexism. For me it was a bit too large of a group to truly feel comfortable sharing such intimate information as personal experiences dealing with sexual abuse, assault, or oppression, but I do agree that such exercises in discussion are of paramount importance. After all, gay culture may be proliferating through our mainstream media nowadays but the primary depiction of homosexuals tends to be wealthy, white, and educated -- leading plenty of uneducated people to believe that the Gay Rights Movement is over and, in fact, seeking out special treatment. This depiction of homosexuality in our media obfuscates the fact that gays are not protected against discriminatory hiring and firing practices or that a great deal of the homosexual, bisexual, and, especially, the transsexual populations are poor and either under- or simply unemployed.
But beyond this, what most interested me, was simply in trying to derive a rhetoric or conversation opener I could utilize when I find myself presented with people who are homophobic simply to protect them and myself from my own tendency to be immediately critical rather than inquiring or constructive. Whenever my grandmother mistakenly or unwittingly says something heterosexist or prejudicial, I do ask her why she feels that way but I haven't yet been able to ask her in a non-accusatory fashion or tone -- and she is a generally loving and accepting woman who simply doesn't recognize the cognitive dissonance of some of her statements -- I'm just the one who doesn't recognize how to speak to her about my disagreements or offense at these remarks. I am self aware enough to know that I can quickly become heated and generalize when I come across something that offends me, and this is something I'm still trying to work on -- especially as a future teacher.
However, I did find that beyond the actual phrase, "heterosexism," there wasn't much said that I hadn't already heard. The same goes for the second speaker who focused on the "Personal is Political." Of course, I don't think that presenting "new" information was necessarily the goal of these seminars -- being in a forum of such discussion and remaining aware of the fact that these problems and cultural issues (and cultural "boxes," such as "Be a Man") persist seemed to be the primary goal, a goal I absolutely agree with and value.
I would like to add, however, a little something to the "Personal is Political" seminar -- I contend that, instead of LOVE YOURSELF being the most important realization to come to in fostering healthy relationships, I posit that being SELF AWARE is as if not more important than loving oneself. In fact, I would say that becoming better self aware is the first and larger step necessary before the step to loving oneself may be truly made. Loving yourself may make you more comfortable and happier with who you are, but becoming fully self aware enables you to better understand not only yourself, but how to articulate your feelings and opinions as well as constructively respond the the feelings and opinions of others. This is probably the largest and most valuable lesson I've come to terms with in college.
And, by the by, thank you again Dr. Giuliano not only for the encouragement and recommendation letter (which was utterly amazing and exceptionally generous), but for making sure I listened to the panel discussion over taking care of oneself. I did find our masculinity speaker particularly articulate and helpful in his explanation of why it is so vital to make sure that everyone, activists, students, and the rest, all take care of themselves in the midst of their battles to better the world. Taking care of yourself, as he explained, isn't selfish but a necessity -- and, in a society as absorbed with motion, binge dieting, drinking, and danger as ours, taking care of oneself can be a radical act and activism all on its own*** (this was his two cents that I found particularly insightful).
Channeling Columbo,
one more thing...
Did anyone else find it peculiar and potentially problematic that almost every photograph included in the "Men Can Help End Gender Violence" pamphlet, flattering or unflattering, is of a young black man?
Just thought I'd throw it out there for further consideration...
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